Seafood and Thoughts on Marriage

No writing for awhile, but I was away at the wedding that the below Bachelorette Party was thrown for. It was held in Syracuse, NY and was a lot of fun. We had an awesome rental car with satellite radio and even though it was a ginormous SUV (Dodge Durango), I really liked driving it and it handled just like a car. The gas mileage wasn’t great, but then again fuel is cheaper on the East Coast.

The food was terrific while we were there too. We had LOADS of SEAFOOD, which made me incredibley happy. There is just no comparison between the Dungeness crab here in California and the blue crab in Maryland. They seem to be two completely different creatures. Wild, I know, but trust me, after chowing down on these tasty little Maryland sea roaches, so sweet, moist and tender, I might have to visit every year to get my fill. My only wish is that there was unlimited time to spend at the table picking each little morsel of flesh from their shells. Oh, and I am now a major fan of Crab Chowder (which is sooo much better then it’s counterpart made from clams). It is a must that I learn to make this even if it is with the canned crab.

Fresh tilapia was delicious and could not be spoiled even prepared by a big chain restaurant that had previously disappointed me in the past. Tilapia is one of my favorite fish which I enjoyed B.L.P. (Before Lichen Planus-the rare skin disease that makes it impossible for me to enjoy spicy food, look it up on the internet if you have any questions) broiled with spicy Chile-Lime butter or sautéed in a pan with garlic, paprika, chili powder, and white wine reduction…oh how I miss the heat. The tilapia was so fresh I though it was going to jump off the plate, and there was enough to share if I were blessed with a clone.

There was so much love in the eyes of the bride and groom that it was beautiful and amazing to stand with them on the alter of the Church and hear them exchange vows. The dedication of their lives to a common goal of support, encouragement, and acceptance of one another in front of friends and family was very sweet and yet a bit surreal since the true marriage takes place over time, not over the course of one wedding day.

The bride comes from a family where her parents have divorced and sometimes I wonder if it is more difficult for children of divorce to believe in marriage as a concept. Or, if it is more difficult for people, like me, who have seen their parents struggle, in a marriage that has been both good and bad. My parents have been married for 37 years to each other and despite some passing threats of divorce during some rough times, they have remained together.

My belief in marriage has wavered and for years I never imagined that the idea would ever appeal to me. I had an easier time picturing myself as a mother then as someone’s wife. Partly I think that may have been because I always knew I could adopt or have a child on my own, but being married takes 2 adults and is something you cannot decide for yourself. Afterall, you cannot fall in love with yourself, have a wedding all alone, celebrate anniversaries with yourself (I think those are called birthdays), nope, marriage was something that I just did not really seriously consider in my teens and early 20s.

Somewhere my thinking all changed, maybe with my best friend from high school or college getting hitched. Maybe with that first trip three years ago to get my first bridesmaids dress. Or maybe I just got tired of being alone with my cats. Nah, that’s not it. I think I just got to a point where I realized that I like being a partner and sharing responsibilities, fun, dreams, and a bed too (and having someone who knows how I like my coffee doesn’t hurt).